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Jackie Mason Quotes

Showing: 1 - 5 Jackie Mason Quotes of 5
'What is the meaning of life?' is a stupid question. Life just exists. You say to yourself, 'I can't accept that I mean nothing so I have to find the meaning of life so that I shouldn't mean as little as I know I do.' Subconsciously you know you're full of shit. I see life as a dance. Does a dance have to have a meaning? You're dancing because you enjoy it.
Blacks can get into medical school with a lower grade ... If that's true, a Jew should be able to play basketball with a lower net.
Did you ever hear of a kid playing accountant - even if he wanted to be one?
It's no longer a question of staying healthy. It's a question of finding a sickness you like.
I have enough money to last me the rest of my life - unless I buy something.
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Relationship Quote
A man keeps another's secret better than he does his own. A woman, on the other hand, keeps her own better than another's.


Change Quote
If you don't like something, change it. If you can't change it, change your attitude. Don't complain.
Friendship Quote
Your friend is the man who knows all about you, and still likes you.
Success Quote
Try not to become a man of success but rather try to become a man of value.

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