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Jackie Mason Quotes
Showing: 1 - 5 Jackie Mason Quotes of 5
'What is the meaning of life?' is a stupid question. Life just exists. You say to yourself, 'I can't accept that I mean nothing so I have to find the meaning of life so that I shouldn't mean as little as I know I do.' Subconsciously you know you're full of shit. I see life as a dance. Does a dance have to have a meaning? You're dancing because you enjoy it.
Blacks can get into medical school with a lower grade ... If that's true, a Jew should be able to play basketball with a lower net.
Did you ever hear of a kid playing accountant - even if he wanted to be one?
It's no longer a question of staying healthy. It's a question of finding a sickness you like.
I have enough money to last me the rest of my life - unless I buy something.
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Funny Quote
Once you can accept the universe as matter expanding into nothing that is something, wearing stripes with plaid comes easy.
Funny Quote
There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.
Marriage Quote
Before marriage, a girl has to make love to a man to hold him. After marriage, she has to hold him to make love to him.
Funny Quote
Once you can accept the universe as matter expanding into nothing that is something, wearing stripes with plaid comes easy.
Wise Quote
A wise girl kisses but doesn't love, listens but doesn't believe, and leaves before she is left.
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