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Showing: 1 - 10 Funny Quotes of 18
Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.
Just going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in your garage makes you a car.
A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.
The reason I talk to myself is because I'm the only one whose answers I accept.
Once you can accept the universe as matter expanding into nothing that is something, wearing stripes with plaid comes easy.
There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.
My tastes are simple: I am easily satisfied with the best.
Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
I love mankind, it's people I can't stand.
Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
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Friend Quote
A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.
Family Quote
You have to live your life according to what comforts you, not what the rest of your family thinks you ought to be doing.
Life Quote
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.
Life Quote
Life is very short, and there's no time for fussing and fighting my friends.
Funny Quote
There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.
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