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Funny Quotes
Showing: 1 - 10 Funny Quotes of 18
Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.
Just going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in your garage makes you a car.
A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.
The reason I talk to myself is because I'm the only one whose answers I accept.
Once you can accept the universe as matter expanding into nothing that is something, wearing stripes with plaid comes easy.
I love mankind, it's people I can't stand.
There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.
My tastes are simple: I am easily satisfied with the best.
Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
Inspirational Quote
Here is the secret of inspiration: tell yourself that thousands and tens of thousands of people, not very intelligent and certainly no more intelligent than the rest of us, have mastered problems as difficult as those that now baffle you.
Change Quote
If you don't like something, change it. If you can't change it, change your attitude. Don't complain.
Truth Quote
The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.
Funny Quote
The reason I talk to myself is because I'm the only one whose answers I accept.
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