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Funny Quotes
Showing: 1 - 10 Funny Quotes of 18
Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.
Just going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in your garage makes you a car.
A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.
The reason I talk to myself is because I'm the only one whose answers I accept.
My tastes are simple: I am easily satisfied with the best.
Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
Once you can accept the universe as matter expanding into nothing that is something, wearing stripes with plaid comes easy.
There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.
Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
I love mankind, it's people I can't stand.
Love Quote
I have feelings too. I am still human. All I want is to be loved, for myself and for my talent.
Marriage Quote
Before marriage, a girl has to make love to a man to hold him. After marriage, she has to hold him to make love to him.
Life Quote
Life is very short, and there's no time for fussing and fighting my friends.
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