Search more than 36,000 Quotes by over 6,000 Authors.
FEATURED
AUTHORS
If you like this page, please
share it with your friends!
share it with your friends!
Funny Quotes
Showing: 1 - 10 Funny Quotes of 18
Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.
Just going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in your garage makes you a car.
A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.
The reason I talk to myself is because I'm the only one whose answers I accept.
Once you can accept the universe as matter expanding into nothing that is something, wearing stripes with plaid comes easy.
I love mankind, it's people I can't stand.
There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.
My tastes are simple: I am easily satisfied with the best.
Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
Relationship Quote
A man keeps another's secret better than he does his own. A woman, on the other hand, keeps her own better than another's.
Relationship Quote
A relationship is what happens between two people who are waiting for something better to come along.
Friendship Quote
Your friend is the man who knows all about you, and still likes you.
Change Quote
If you don't like something, change it. If you can't change it, change your attitude. Don't complain.
All quotations on this website are the property and copyright of their respective authors. All quotations are provided for educational and informational purposes only.
Copyright © 2011 LifeQuotesLib.com. All Rights Reserved.