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Funny Quotes
Showing: 1 - 10 Funny Quotes of 18
Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.
Just going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in your garage makes you a car.
A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.
The reason I talk to myself is because I'm the only one whose answers I accept.
Once you can accept the universe as matter expanding into nothing that is something, wearing stripes with plaid comes easy.
There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line.
My tastes are simple: I am easily satisfied with the best.
Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
I love mankind, it's people I can't stand.
Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.
Life Quote
I'm the one that has to die when it's time for me to die, so let me live my life, the way I want to.
Wise Quote
Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to pause and reflect.
Inspirational Quote
Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.
Change Quote
If you don't like something, change it. If you can't change it, change your attitude. Don't complain.
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