A few weeks after my surgery, I went out to play catch with my golden retriever. When I bent over to pick up the ball, my prosthesis fell out. The dog snatched it, and I found myself chasing him down the road yelling, 'Hey, come back here with my breast!'

The first law of journalism is to confirm existing prejudice, rather than contradict it.

Dreck is dreck and no amount of fancy polish is going to make it anything else.

I want to know why, if men rule the world, they don't stop wearing neckties.