Mitch Hedberg Quotes

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Mitch Hedberg Quotes

Showing: 1 - 5 Mitch Hedberg Quotes of 5

When someone hands you a flier it's like they're saying, "Here, you throw this away."

Mitch Hedberg

Alcoholism is the only disease that you can get yelled at for having.

Mitch Hedberg

I'd hate to be a giraffe with a sore throat.

Mitch Hedberg

I got into an argument with my girlfriend inside a tent. A tent is not a good place for an argument. I tried to walk out on her and had to slam the flap.

Mitch Hedberg

I like rice. Rice is great when you're hungry and want 2000 of something.

Mitch Hedberg

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Funny Quote

Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.

- Mark Twain

Love Quote

I'm not afraid of death; I just don't want to be there when it happens.

- Woody Allen

Humorous Quote

Insanity is doing the same thing, over and over again, but expecting different results.

- Albert Einstein

Success Quote

Try not to become a man of success but rather try to become a man of value.

- Albert Einstein

Success Quote

Success is liking yourself, liking what you do, and liking how you do it.

- Maya Angelou

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