Mitch Hedberg Quotes

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Ralph Waldo Emerson

Famous American poet, essayist and philosopher.

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Famous American actress, model and singer.

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German-born mathematician and theoretical physicist.

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Mitch Hedberg Quotes

Showing: 1 - 5 Mitch Hedberg Quotes of 5

When someone hands you a flier it's like they're saying, "Here, you throw this away."

Mitch Hedberg

Alcoholism is the only disease that you can get yelled at for having.

Mitch Hedberg

I'd hate to be a giraffe with a sore throat.

Mitch Hedberg

I got into an argument with my girlfriend inside a tent. A tent is not a good place for an argument. I tried to walk out on her and had to slam the flap.

Mitch Hedberg

I like rice. Rice is great when you're hungry and want 2000 of something.

Mitch Hedberg

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Life Quote

You never know what life is like, until you have lived it.

- Marilyn Monroe

Funny Quote

Just going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in your garage makes you a car.

- G. K. Chesterton

Age Quote

Do not grow old, no matter how long you live. Never cease to stand like curious children before the Great Mystery into which we are born.

- Albert Einstein

Funny Quote

Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.

- Phyllis Diller

Success Quote

Success is liking yourself, liking what you do, and liking how you do it.

- Maya Angelou

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