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Bob Smith Quotes

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I came out to my family on Thanksgiving. I said, 'Mom, please pass the gravy to a homosexual.' She passed it to my father. A terrible scene ensued.

Bob Smith

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Funny Quote

Once you can accept the universe as matter expanding into nothing that is something, wearing stripes with plaid comes easy.

- Albert Einstein

Funny Quote

Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.

- Mark Twain

Life Quote

To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all.

- Oscar Wilde

Life Quote

I'm the one that has to die when it's time for me to die, so let me live my life, the way I want to.

- Jimi Hendrix

Funny Quote

Always go to other people's funerals, otherwise they won't come to yours.

- Yogi Berra

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