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Dave Barry Quotes

Showing: 1 - 10 Dave Barry Quotes of 16
Meetings are an addictive, highly self-indulgent activity that corporations and other large organizations habitually engage in only because they cannot actually masturbate.
A perfect parent is a person with excellent child-rearing theories and no actual children.
We journalists make it a point to know very little about an extremely wide variety of topics; this is how we stay objective.
Never assume that the guy understands that you and he have a relationship.
We believe that electricity exists, because the electric company keeps sending us bills for it.
A person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person.
Socially prominent people are very fond of disease, because it gives them a chance to have these really elaborate charity functions, and the newspaper headlines say 'EVENING IN PARIS BALL RAISES MONEY TO FIGHT GOUT' instead of 'RICH PEOPLE AMUSE THEMSELVES'.
Democracy: in which you say what you like and do what you're told.
As a child, I was more afraid of tetanus shots than, for example, Dracula.
Fishing is boring, unless you catch an actual fish, and then it is disgusting.





Motivational Quote
Action may not always bring happiness, but there is no happiness without action.
Life Quote
The most important thing is to enjoy your life-to be happy-it's all that matters.
Relationship Quote
A woman we love rarely satisfies all our needs, and we deceive her with a woman whom we do not love.

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