Fishing is boring, unless you catch an actual fish, and then it is disgusting.

Never lick a steak knife.

Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.

The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we all believe that we are above-average drivers.

If you have a big enough dictionary, just about everything is a word.