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Demetri Martin Quotes

Showing: 1 - 4 Demetri Martin Quotes of 4
I like video games but they're really violent. I'd like to play a video game where you help the people who were shot in all the other games. It'd be called 'Really Busy Hospital'.
The worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades.
I want to make a jigsaw puzzle that's 40,000 pieces. And when you finish it, it says, 'Go outside.'
Saying I'm sorry' is the same as saying 'I apologize'. Except at a funeral.
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Truth Quote
The truth is, everyone is going to hurt you. You just got to find the ones worth suffering for.
Funny Quote
Once you can accept the universe as matter expanding into nothing that is something, wearing stripes with plaid comes easy.
Marriage Quote
Before marriage, a girl has to make love to a man to hold him. After marriage, she has to hold him to make love to him.

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