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Rodney Dangerfield Quotes
Showing: 1 - 10 Rodney Dangerfield Quotes of 14
I came from a real tough neighborhood. Why, every time I shut the window I hurt somebody's fingers.
Once I pulled a job, I was so stupid. I picked a guy's pocket on an airplane and made a run for it.
People seldom live up to their baby pictures.
The other night I told my kid, 'Someday you'll have children of your own.' He said, 'So will you.'
When I was a kid my parents moved alot - but I always found them.
I had a blind date. I waited two hours on the corner. A girl walked by, and I said, 'Are you Louise?' She said, 'Are you Rodney?' I said, 'Yeah.' She said, 'I'm not Louise.'
There Goes the Neighborhood
My wife made me join a bridge club. I jump off next Tuesday.
If I could have dinner with anyone who lived in history, it would depend on the restaurant.
A hooker told me, 'Not on the first date.'
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Inspirational Quote
There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.
Trust Quote
You believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself.
Friend Quote
A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out.
Life Quote
Sometimes the questions are complicated and the answers are simple.
Wise Quote
A wise girl kisses but doesn't love, listens but doesn't believe, and leaves before she is left.
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