Steven Wright Quotes

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Ralph Waldo Emerson

Famous American poet, essayist and philosopher.

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Marilyn Monroe

Famous American actress, model and singer.

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Albert Einstein

German-born mathematician and theoretical physicist.

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Steven Wright Quotes

Showing: 11 - 20 Steven Wright Quotes of 21

Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.

Steven Wright

I saw a man with a wooden leg, and a real foot.

Steven Wright

My theory of evolution is that Darwin was adopted.

Steven Wright

I lost a buttonhole.

Steven Wright

I have not lost my mind - it's backed up on disk somewhere.

Steven Wright

About four years ago ... No, it was yesterday.

Steven Wright

My friend Winnie is a procrastinator. He didn't get his birthmark until he was eight years old.

Steven Wright

Why, in a country of free speech, are there phone bills?

Steven Wright

43.7 per cent of all statistics are made up on the spot.

Steven Wright

I was going to commit suicide the other day, but I must not have been serious because I bought a beach towel.

Steven Wright

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Humorous Quote

Creativity is knowing how to hide your sources

- Albert Einstein

Funny Quote

Always go to other people's funerals, otherwise they won't come to yours.

- Yogi Berra

Wise Quote

A wise girl kisses but doesn't love, listens but doesn't believe, and leaves before she is left.

- Marilyn Monroe

Motivational Quote

It's not the load that breaks you down, it's the way you carry it.

- Lou Holtz

Life Quote

Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.

- Maya Angelou

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