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Steven Wright Quotes
Showing: 11 - 20 Steven Wright Quotes of 21
Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm.
I saw a man with a wooden leg, and a real foot.
My theory of evolution is that Darwin was adopted.
I lost a buttonhole.
I have not lost my mind - it's backed up on disk somewhere.
About four years ago ... No, it was yesterday.
My friend Winnie is a procrastinator. He didn't get his birthmark until he was eight years old.
Why, in a country of free speech, are there phone bills?
43.7 per cent of all statistics are made up on the spot.
I was going to commit suicide the other day, but I must not have been serious because I bought a beach towel.
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Life Quote
Open your eyes, look within. Are you satisfied with the life you're living?
Funny Quote
Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.
Funny Quote
Once you can accept the universe as matter expanding into nothing that is something, wearing stripes with plaid comes easy.
Life Quote
Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.
Life Quote
The time we waste trying to find out what life is all about could be spent loving someone and finding out.
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