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Jewish Quotes

Showing: 1 - 8 Jewish Quotes of 8
They say we Jews are mean, greedy and all we think about is money. I wish I had five pounds for every time I've heard that.
If my Catholic boyfriend and I ever have a kid, we'll just be honest with it. We'll say that Mommy is one of God's chosen people, and Daddy believes that Jesus is magic!
The only advantage I have found in being Jewish is that I can be openly anti-Semitic.
Who hates the Jews more than the Jew?
As everyone knows, where there are two Jews there are three opinions.
It is a family joke that when I was a tiny child I turned from the window out of which I was watching a snowstorm, and hopefully asked, 'Momma, do we believe in winter?'
I suppose the nearest equivalent to a bar mitzvah in terms of emotional build-up would probably not even be one's wedding day, but one's coronation.
For me this is the vital litmus test: no intellectual society can flourish where a Jew feels even slightly uneasy.
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Change Quote
If you don't like something, change it. If you can't change it, change your attitude. Don't complain.


Family Quote
You have to live your life according to what comforts you, not what the rest of your family thinks you ought to be doing.
Life Quote
Life is pure adventure, and the sooner we realize that, the quicker we will be able to treat life as art.
Funny Quote
Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.
Happiness Quote
There is only one way to happiness and that is to cease worrying about things which are beyond the power of our will.

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