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Erma Bombeck Quotes
Brief author info: Erma Bombeck (1927-1996) American humorist and writer.
Showing: 1 - 10 Erma Bombeck Quotes of 18
Women are never what they seem to be. There is the woman you see and the woman who is hidden. Buy the gift for the woman who is hidden.
Never go to a doctor whose office plants are dead.
All of us have moments in our lives that test our courage. Taking children into a house with a white carpet is one of them.
To my way of thinking, the American family started to decline when parents began to communicate with their children.
It's simply wrong to always order kids to stop that fighting. There are times when one child is simply defending his rights and damned well should be fighting.
What does it profit a 78-year-old woman to sit around the pool in a bikini if she cannot feed herself?
If life is a bowl of cherries, what am I doing in the pits?
Getting out of hospital is a lot like resigning from a book club. You're not out until the computer says you're out.
Maybe you know why a child can reject a hot dog with mustard served on a soft bun at home, yet eat six of them two hours later at fifty cents each.
Guilt: the Gift that keeps on giving.
Funny Quote
Once you can accept the universe as matter expanding into nothing that is something, wearing stripes with plaid comes easy.
Funny Quote
Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.
Marriage Quote
Before marriage, a girl has to make love to a man to hold him. After marriage, she has to hold him to make love to him.
Inspirational Quote
There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.
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