Corporation, n. An ingenious device for obtaining individual profit without individual responsibility.

Auctioneer, n. The man who proclaims with a hammer that he has picked a pocket with his tongue.

Ritualism, n. A Dutch Garden of God where He may walk in rectilinear freedom, keeping off the grass.

Circus, n. A place where horses, ponies and elephants are permitted to see men, women and children acting the fool.

Comfort, n. A state of mind produced by contemplation of a neighbor's uneasiness.

Compromise, n. Such an adjustment of conflicting interests as gives each adversary the satisfaction of thinking he has got what he ought not to have, and is deprived of nothing except what was justly his due.

Abnormal, adj. Not conforming to standard. In matters of thought and conduct, to be independent is to be abnormal, to be abnormal is to be detested.

Conversation, n. A fair for the display of the minor mental commodities, each exhibitor being too intent upon the arrangement of his own wares to observe those of his neighbor.

Politeness, n. The most acceptable hypocrisy.

Decide, v.i. To succumb to the preponderance of one set of influences over another set.