... an existentialist, a man who defines the whole universe by the fact that he happens to be in it.

There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, Than are dreamt of in your philosophy.

What one decides to do in a crisis depends upon one's philosophy of life, and that philosophy cannot be changed by an incident. If one hasn't any philosophy in a crisis, others make the decision.

My philosophy? Have a laugh for as long as you can and don't get run over. Or stabbed.

I've tried Buddhism, Scientology, Numerology, Transcendental Meditation, Qabbala, t'ai chi, feng shui and Deepak Chopra but I find straight gin works best.

Remembering is the opposite of being here now; it's being there now.

Science is what you know, philosophy is what you don't know.

Why are philosophers intent on forcing others to believe things? Is that a nice way to behave towards someone?

Philosophy is common sense in a dress suit.

It's a small world but I wouldn't want to paint it.